I have previously posted about "The Work" of Byron Katie. Her simple approach to life is to be curious about the stories we tell ourselves - to inquire within about the veracity of many of our thoughts, judgments and beliefs. Whether we realize it or not, many of our assumptions and perceptions about ourself, our loved ones, the world, are a source of much anxiety and pain. We often point at circumstances or people as the cause of our pain, while Katie demonstrates that we need to take responsibility, look within and challenge our thinking.
Katie offers an easy method for freedom from distress by using a method of self-inquiry. I have provided her series of questions for the self-inquiry below. You can learn more about Katie, her work, her writings by visiting her website at www.thework.com. There you can download a free pamphlet containing her life-enhancing philosophy, as well as worksheets to use as you apply her method to your own painful or counterproductive thinking.
It has been my experience that we often put up the most resistance to the very things that would most benefit us. I know I felt quite resistant to her self-inquiry method - feeling it was overly simplistic and that people and the world are just too complex to find emotional freedom with the use of four basic questions. But I persisted through my skepticism and resistance and have found a key to opening the murky lenses of my perception. So worth the effort. Do give it a try.
If you would like to see Katie helping others with similar issues as yours, using the four questions, there are videos you can watch on her website. There are also many videos of her working posted on YouTube. You just have to type 'Byron Katie' in the search box. Here is her method of self-inquiry:
P.S. It occurred to me while publishing comments that it would have been helpful if I had posted examples of the types of thoughts, beliefs, judgments that can benefit from being challenged a la Byron Katie. So here are a few examples illustrating the kind of thinking that can be challenged with self-inquiry. What thoughts, beliefs, assumptions, judgments do you have that need challenging?
* I must do everything I can to prevent my children from suffering.
* Life just isn't worth living since my my husband died.
* I'm just not the type of person who easily attracts the opposite sex.
* My mother should stop asking me questions about my life.
* I can't bear to see my wife suffer with this disease.
* I'm not able to spend much time alone.
* I just can't travel to a foreign country by myself.
* I'm just not cut out to be a good mother.
* I'm basically just an angry person.
* My son should settle down and get married.
* I'll never recover from those terrible losses in the stock market.
* My wife should pay more attention to me.
Is it true?
Is it really true?
How do you feel when you believe that thought?
Who would you be without that thought?
Turn the thought around. (E.g. I should pay more attention to my wife.)