Sunday, June 28, 2009

caught in self-criticism?


Western culture seems to condition us to feel fundamentally unworthy. Perhaps that is what prepares us to be good, little consumers - ever searching for the thing that will finally mask our supposed flaws or prove our worthiness.
Our task, as an adult, is to examine and question our basic assumptions about ourself and refuse to get caught in self-denial, self-criticism, even self-hate. (BTW, manifestations of self-hate can be quite subtle.)
What would your life be like if you refused to allow harsh judgments about yourself to run rampant in your mind? Imagine the relief - the freedom to be, to give and to receive.
It seems to be a fundamental internal law that feelings of guilt or unworthiness demand punishment. If you believe you are flawed or guilty in some way, you will find ways to fulfill the "requirement" to punish yourself. Could it be that you find ways to deny, procrastinate or prevent your own good in order to punish yourself for being guilty of having normal human flaws? Remember, implicit in most advertising encouraging us to consume is the message that we are not good enough as we are. Why not declare yourself acceptable, lovable, and worthy regardless of any human flaws and frailties? (We all have them!) What is it that old song says - "try a little tenderness" - how about on yourself? It's time.

6 comments:

  1. This is a problem I had as a younger woman, but have somehow managed to leave behind as I have become older. I am not a source for income for very many, my consuming days are left behind. It's an easier way to lead a life.

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  2. What a very insightful and inspirational post! I think that age has a lot to do with being comfortable and accepting oneself as we are. I'm with Sandra. I think through life's lessons, we have learned the confidence we need to accept.

    Thanks for stopping by and entering the giveaway. I wouldn't have read this great post!!

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  4. I so agree with Sandra and Alicia. Age does bring acceptance - of self and of many things. It is such a comfortable place to be, and it frees up so much time to create and contribute to all life on the planet. Maybe that is it:

    Create/Contribute vs. Consume

    Alicia is making a lovely contribution to us all with a fantastic giveaway on her blog: boylerpf. Check it out.

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  5. Worldly culture has a neurotic preoccupation with the delude notion of reforming a self identity that fundamentally does not exist. From this schism comes all our warped concepts of self hate and sin. Nice blog, I like simplicity and gardening too. Have a great day.

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  6. Twisted Branch:

    Thanks for the comment. I have visited your site 3 times and tried to leave a comment. It always says "error on page". This happens to me at a few other blogs too. Not sure what I am doing wrong.
    Anyway, I love your insights and will be visiting your blog often to help me remember who i am not . . . Ego-mind has a strong grip (years of habit??) and I have to stay awake to it's illusions, false needs, and tricky fears. It seems to be my default position -
    Thanks again.
    Bonnie

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